Free from worry, guilt, feelings of unworthiness, expectations, comparison, body shaming, the fucking number on the scale controlling you, fear of foods we eat¦
I am talking about eating healthy and working out¦
Sometimes its all just too much.
Sometimes in life you feel like you have so much going on, how do you even focus on health, fitness, ourselves?
I do believe that sometimes you just have to let it all go and be free from all the bullshit that we let ourselves feel from it all..
The worry of eating right, working out, did I drink all my water, I really want the donut but I can’t, well they are eating pizza why can’t I, and just one more drink, can all just be too much Am I right? Have you ever felt like this?
Most times I try to make the healthiest choices.
But ya know what sometimes it feels good to let it all go and not worry about it all and let go of all the bullying we do to ourselves when we do.
If we are going to take a break then do it with out guilt.
And that’s what I’ve done!! Am I proud of it, no but it did feel good to not worry about it all!! The donuts tasted so good, the pizza was delicious, the fudge was amazing!!
We went on vacation, I wanted to chill and enjoy myself. If I wanted the damn bread at dinner I was going to have it, if I wanted fudge I had it, itâ€™s the beach after all!!
But you know I think there was an underlying reason to my relaxation of my health & fitness and I didnâ€™t realize it first.
Itâ€™s because I am an emotional mess, it started on vaca because I knew what I was coming home to.Â Coming home to my daughter leaving the nestâ€¦
And I am a wreck, I am lost and I just havenâ€™t given a shit about myself, my well-being or taking care of myself. Iâ€™ve always been an emotional eater. I never really came to terms with this until this past year, but I missed this trigger.
I had other things on my mind and making sure to have the fucking salad wasnâ€™t one of themâ€¦
there is a fine line to this break in doing whatâ€™s right for you health, for your body..
thereâ€™s a dangerous line to why we are taking the break. Is it truly just a break to enjoy eating certain things are is it because we donâ€™t give a damn because something in our life is not right?
If I do it too long then all the hard work I’ve done is gone.Â And I can already see it happening, its only been a week and a half people but it all goes to shit quicklyâ€¦
I can’t do it too long or I get out of the habit and end up in a downward spiral.Â And I can feel it, see it spiraling out of controlâ€¦
I can’t do it too long or I feel worse.Â And I can already feel it.. I feel like shit inside & out! Not taking care of me is starting to take its toll on me, I am not my best self. And this is affecting my family. Itâ€™s effecting my well-being ~ mind, body, & soul
But sometimes it feels damn good to let it all go and not worry about.
But sometimes it feels worse when we do.
So be cautious of your breaks.
Be cautious of your mindset.Â Donâ€™t bully yourself. Donâ€™t quilt yourself into making changes. Â Love yourself enough to want to take care of yourself. Love your family enough to want to take care of you for themâ€¦
I have to get out of this hole I have dug for myselfâ€¦ For me & for my familyâ€¦ I donâ€™t like how I feel. And am the only one who can change this.